FlurbCo is a dynamic, global company looking for a self-motivated person ready to take on the most critical role at any Pizza Implosion franchise: Ball Pit Supervisor. Even though compensation and benefits are not spectacular, competition for the position will be fierce since for many young people just out of college, being a lifeguard at a pool filled with colorful plastic balls seems like a dream job. Ball Pit Supervisor sounds technical and impressive. Plus, it has the word "supervisor" in it, which looks like a management role even though we both know that is beyond your capabilities. If you squint your eyes and look at the job title, you might confuse it for one of those "real jobs" your parents keep telling you to get.
Job Description:
- Assist team members with birthday party celebrations and general crowd control.
- Enforce ball pit safety rules and discipline in accordance with company policy.
- Following a regular maintenance schedule, take the balls out of the pit and thoroughly clean them. This should occur at least every five years.
- When needed, form search and rescue teams to locate children who disappear into the ball pit.
Qualifications:
- You should possess a winning attitude.
- You should enjoy having fun and be an experienced fun-haver.
- You should be familiar with the 7 tenets of Unkle Nyuck Nyuck's Manifesto of Fun.
- Bonus points for CPR certification or an MBA.
Benefits:
- No medical. No dental. No PTO when you inevitably catch pink eye from the fecal matter that we all know is on those balls.
- Salary is listed as "competitive," which is a term that has no legal meaning. We'll ask you what you think you're worth during the interview after an hour of relentless negging. You'll crumble and accept minimum wage. You always do. It's how we keep labor costs so low. That's the FlurbCo Way!
